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That's much better. Not only that, Commish, dude, it's made my day - for the sun will soon be rising here in old Lisbon! :)

You got your monkey in my peanut butter!
You got your peanut butter in my monkey!

Rhesus Peanut Butter Cups-two great tastes that taste great together.

Look at the face. Must not be crunchy.

Looks like me eating some well-aged kimchi.

I always go back for more, though.

When he takes off the glasses and grabs the jar, Alan Greenspan's co-workers know enough not to interrupt "Peanut Butter Time."

jonmc, you just qualified for the "Irresistibly Bad Pun Hall of Fame". What are you going to do now?

Cannot. Resist. Delurking. :)

{mad scientist voice}Witness the very first step in creating a Bonsai Monkey...{/mad scientist voice}

Choosy monkeys choose Jif.

Actually the poor thing looks like he is about to toss his cookies.

*Big Cheesy Grin*

I'm going to Monkey Land

Welcome, ChaosKitty. Lurk no longer. Come into the light...

No, that look is caused by the Reduced Fat Jif...I have some on my desk...it's nasty. :)

Oh, the reduced fat is the nastiest! It's all sugary--the consistency is all wrong.

Only Skippy Super Chunk will do.

Two things Brad didn't like about his new roommate :
One, he had a monkey, and two, regurgitated peanut butter could only be discerned from standard peanut butter by taste alone.

There is no peanut butter but Jiff. All others are cruel and unusual imitations.

So say the choosy mothers, adam

why don't the choosy father's give a rat's ass about what kind of peanut butter their kids are eating?

It'll all come out in therapy.

By the way, I can't stand peanut butter.

Nor can I, though I've tried to at least once a year since I first hated it. I love peanuts and I love butter - I even like frying potato chips in peanut oil. But I can't stomach peanut butter. It's sweet and against Nature.

Jelly I also despise, specially that so-called "Grape Jelly" you have in America, a mystery akin to Grape Nuts, Moby Grape, etc.

*ducks*

Just wait, my friend. The wonders of technology!

And Grape Nuts are really useful. My cat insists they're much more comfortable than the usual Jonny Cat.

Peanut butter is divine. Jasper eats it by the spoonful, sometimes three in a row. And ALWAYS Jiff.

Goober Grape is an abomination. A plan by The Man to keep us in our place. Or, something.

I had heard that they were going to begin selling peanut butter in individually wrapped "slices"--like that processed Kraft cheese. For working mothers who don't have the time to dip a knife in a jar, apparently.

What ever happened with that?

The very act of creating such a thing opened a gaping hole in the space-time continuum. There are a bunch of scientists hanging with the trilobites now. Soon to be a Showtime original series.

hey, my grandfather invented an individual cheese slice wrapping machine for Borden. not that i'm bragging or anything.

Ach! Miguel has been called a lot of things, but now a bandwidth thief?

She says I'm frivilous too, just because I sometimes gambil like the little lamb I am. It's ridicilous if you ask me.

too...many...i's...can't...process...

dagnabbit! i put in the code, i swear!

OK, weird thing. You can't have any line breaks before the art begins. in other words instead of:

the funky code

monkey art
monkey art
monkey art
monkey art
the other funky code

It should be:

the funky code
monkey art
monkey art
monkey art
the other funky code

True. I see where that would mess things up. Sigh, I am just a padawan ASCII replicator, and have not fully grasped its implementation.

Peanut butter in slices?
Now that's just wrong.

Ach! Miguel has been called a lot of things, but now a bandwidth thief?

Hey! You try rhyming something "beef."

Relief, grief, motif, brief, massif - let's be glad I'm not so coherent in the early morning that I'd thought of any of those, it really wouldn't have been pretty.

ah, miguel is now a "robin hood" type figure. stealing bandwidth from the poor and--wait a minute.

There used to be a fairly popular band in Bloomington, IN called "Jif and the Choosy Mothers"

Misty: You have a beautiful site. Please don't let the monkeys scare you away. If you stay, we'll keep our pants on.

If you stay, we'll keep our pants on.

Oh, well I must leave immediately then!

...

This is a trick question, isn't it.

Trick pants.

Swear to god, I saw the peanut butter in slices in the Tom Thumb grocery store the other day. It's by the weird orange processed cheese food stuff. *shudder*.

There was a slightly harried mom who was about to pick a packet of said sliced PB up, and I couldn't help myself, I had to stop her, show her the price, calculated the price per oz, then showed her a jar of Jif (not the reduced fat kind), and calculated the price per oz for her...and thus, was an American family saved from unspeakable, but certain evil as she returned the packet of PB like food product back.

Now, if I could just convince people that brie and crackers is a healthy snack.

And we're keeping our pants on now? Sheesh, you guys are always changing the rules. Nobody kept their pants on for me. Hmmph.

Misty's still pure. You're spoilt.

Misty's still pure.

Which scale are we using?

Well, you haven't shown your potty mouth, yet. So, I'm just guessing. And your site is all neat and clean.

Of course, you may just be a thunderslut* like some others we won't name. Either way, welcome to our happy land.

* copyright coldchef 2002. Does not apply to anyone here. Except for witchstone, goneill, Dong_resin, and brittney. And others.

hmmm. i would say i'm closer to lightning slut than thunderslut. but i still like the sound of it.

And your site is all neat and clean.

I'm pure! In that, "It's my first time," every time sort of way.

Either way, welcome to our happy land.

*blush* Thanks. It's my first time.

dude, does that mean i'm not a thunderslut? or am
i included in others?

also, hi misty!

When I was a little kid my uncles called me "thunder butt".

That's probably more than you all needed to know.

Hi Misty! Please forgive this old bandwidth thief... :)

you know what i like about misty? it feels like the first time. feel like the very first time. uh oh, i feel a foreigner episode coming on. i'll try ride it out. you know how it goes--double vision, you feel a little hot blooded, then cold as ice.

*groan* oh my god. shoot me now.

Psst...witchstone...

I've been waiting for a girl like you to come into my life. I want to know what love is, I want you to show me. It's urgent.

crash--you could just be my jukebox hero. i used to be all about adam ant, but that was yesterday. so, say you will? make up your mind this time.

I'm a dirty white boy, you know what I'm sayin? Still, you keep on playin' head games.

oh dear...you two are a long, long way from home.

HA!

"The wearer of this belt shall posess all the superpowers of 70s supergroup Foreigner."

ooo, i don't think i could handle all that power. well, yeah i could.

*thundersluts around*

is thunderslut a verb, too? That rocks. Please send photos.

*wipes up*

A note about posting images:

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