It's time to find out. Of course a far more urgent task is to size up politicians, screen actors, clergymen, friends, romans, countrymen and other distinguished pricks...
Hey, you wanted Dr. Ruth, you got her!
Posted by at August 21, 2002 12:39 AMapparently, if i was a man, i would have a very small penis.
Posted by: pikachu lolita on August 21, 2002 01:17 AMSubject's Estimated Penis Size = 6.9" - 7.4"
Mm...big...but maybe not enough to warrant condomi's new XXL. Why not try condomi Nature - transparent and lubricated with a teat end.
Yeah, but you should see it angry.*
*Ten bonus points available for movie reference.
Posted by: Crash on August 21, 2002 01:27 AMpLo-having a small dick is a blessing in your case, a big cock looks terrible in a miniskirt.
Posted by: jonmc on August 21, 2002 01:41 AMApparently, Crash and I have the same penis.
But I get to use it on weekends.
Posted by: kafkaesque on August 21, 2002 01:58 AMthe magical combination seems to be extra large feet and hands, but small nose. the recommendation:
estimated penis size: 9.5"-9.9"
very impressive! might even suggest condimi's new xxl condom. you might need to pick up some lubricant too!
Posted by: pikachu lolita on August 21, 2002 02:25 AMestimated penis size: 9.5"-9.9"
very impressive! might even suggest condimi's new xxl condom. you might need to pick up some lubricant too!
I can't decide if a 10 inch boner would make me squeal in delight or in fear...
6.3" - 6.9"
Based on my results, I have concluded that this test is frighteningly accurate.
Posted by: pardon me on August 21, 2002 09:48 AMStand back ladies and gentleman and... wait... where'd it go?
Posted by: eyeballkid on August 21, 2002 12:51 PMThat wouldn't be a reference to the Pride of Hamtramck, would it, Crash?
Posted by: RakDaddy on August 21, 2002 01:26 PMAlright, monkeys. This picture is begging for a caption. Have at it.
Posted by: adampsyche on August 21, 2002 02:07 PM"Your big nose doesn't mean shit, son; it's the big ape-like hands that tell the ladies about your nuclear capabilities."
Posted by: Miguel on August 21, 2002 02:20 PMi ♥ romakimmy too. i am now glad that i posted this. miguel's was good as well!
Posted by: adampsyche on August 21, 2002 02:26 PMsince we're discussing penises, let me regale you with a story from my mormon youth. mormons love to have dances for "the youth of zion" aged 14-18 (then they have "singles dances" to try and get people married off once you're older). but anyway, it's good clean fun (except for the people who are boozing it up in the parking lot). well, one night i went to one of these dances and i met a rebellious young lad (i always went for the bad boys) who informed me that his name was john holmes, jr. his friend laughed at that, and i, having no idea who john holmes was, assumed that it was because of the whole "junior" thing. a few minutes later, i introduced him to my friend kathy as "john holmes JUNIOR" and then everyone cracked up and kathy gently took me aside and explained the joke. i was mortified that i hadn't known what i was talking about.
Posted by: witchstone on August 21, 2002 02:33 PM*blushes*
Runner-up: Marine Gen. Peter Pace laughs in Donald Rumsfield's face as the later attempts to disspell the rumour that his arm injury was due to excessive masturbation.
Posted by: romakimmy on August 21, 2002 02:41 PMi haven't heard anything, so i'm assuming that's a good thing. i guess it will take a few weeks to make sure he doesn't get an infection. he was supposed to be back in peru at the beginning of the month, but now it looks like he'll be sticking around utah until about mid-october.
Posted by: witchstone on August 21, 2002 02:44 PM"So I reached up to grab Condoleeza's breasts like this, and that's when she twisted my wrist. So that's how I got this stupid cast."
Posted by: pardon me on August 21, 2002 02:45 PMStep one of my Michael Jackson transformation is complete. Step two: taunt a major until he breaks my nose, thereby covering up plastic surgery.
Posted by: Ufez Jones on August 21, 2002 03:38 PMWhile watching Donald Rumsfeld in mid-Hokey Pokey, Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff Marine Gen. Peter Pace says to himself, "That's what it's all about."
Posted by: MarsCrash on August 21, 2002 09:14 PMA note about posting images:
We encourage users to post images, especially those hilarous pics of monkeys
wearing dresses or programming for Linux. But posting images that reside on someone
else's server is considered by many to be bandwidth theft. Our thoughts
on the matter, along with some solutions to the problem, can be found
here. Thanks.
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