Are you a curmudgeon before your time? Does practically anything leave you totally grumpy? Are you cynical and bitter even after you've had a few?
If you're a fan of "One Foot In The Grave" you'll know what this BBC Quiz is all about. If not, tough cheese! Or don't be like that - go ahead anyway. We're talking universal values here. And you get to win extra Anglophilia points too. Not that they're worth much nowadays... *sigh*
Posted by at August 28, 2002 04:23 AMOh piss off.*
[Pins "Best.Comment.Ever" medal on dong, where it most hurts the little prick]
*Much more English
Posted by: Miguel on August 28, 2002 06:05 AMIf the man in the pic was a woman instead, he/she would look disturbingly like my mother.
Posted by: b****fire on August 28, 2002 07:05 AM*hikes pants up to his armpits*
HEY YOU KIDS!
GET OFF MY DAMN LAWN!
Posted by: tj on August 28, 2002 08:55 AM*says nothing, merely pours bucket of cold water onto damn noisy kids from the window of her 2 floor apartment*
Posted by: romakimmy on August 28, 2002 08:57 AMWhat's really bothersome is I just laid a traffic cone orange-hued poo.
I don't even know what this thread is about, really, I'm just typing to distract myself from the tsunami of panic.
Posted by: dong resin on August 28, 2002 10:48 AMIt is entirely possible that I might still be drunk from last night. What can you do but drink when you go see the band fronted by the spawn of Cher & Greg Allman?
Adam: I have a date with Aw today.
Posted by: witchstone on August 28, 2002 10:55 AMYeah, she mentioned that. Have a ball, and never mind the man following you with the camera!
Posted by: adampsyche on August 28, 2002 11:03 AMGirls on dates! I love that!
I am not sure what this thread is about either, I just keep posting crusty old fart comments in Brit-speak. The picture of the geezer in the titfer makes me do it.
Dong resin, that's both remarkable and disgusting, but nothing to be alarmed about (said Dr. Mom.) You probably ate a bad Cheeto.
Posted by: tizzie on August 28, 2002 11:10 AMehhhh...shaddup!
*begins banging cane on porridge tray*
*demands diaper be changed and TV be tuned to Matlock*
You probably ate a bad Cheeto...
*gets mental image of an unshaven Chester Cheetah with a cigarette dangling from his lips and a beer in his hand out looking for trouble*
See that's what happens when spokescharacters fall out of favor, it's sad really.
It'll all be detailed in Behind the Snackfood:Chester Cheetah
Posted by: jonmc on August 28, 2002 11:18 AM*pulls a wizzle on his buntie, then calls everyone guv'nor*
Posted by: dong resin on August 28, 2002 11:32 AM*conquers known world, loses it, then becomes quaint tourist attraction*
Posted by: jonmc on August 28, 2002 11:33 AM
Oh well, if no one wants to take the quiz, here's my analysis of dongboy's traffic cone problem: it's either gas or worse.
i just got the loudest case of the hiccups i have ever heard
Posted by: adampsyche on August 28, 2002 11:35 AMI say, old sock! I'll see your Chester Cheetah and raise you a Frito Bandito, guvnor.
Posted by: kafkaesque on August 28, 2002 11:37 AMOh, yeeaahh, then I raise you Mr. Wiggle and Park Ranger Fuel!
Posted by: jonmc on August 28, 2002 11:53 AM
*hic* The only way I know of to get rid of them is to eat peanut butter *hic* (which I don't normally carry around with me). Any *hic* other suggestions? People across the room are getting annoyed at me. *hic*
Posted by: adampsyche on August 28, 2002 11:55 AM
Spoonful of sugar is just about the best way, Adam. It helps if you put on a Mary Poppins outfit and sing for a while too.
Posted by: kafkaesque on August 28, 2002 12:02 PMSpoonful of sugar? I'll try that, what the hell. But the Mary Poppins routine is not supported...
Posted by: adampsyche on August 28, 2002 12:03 PMReally. It'll be great! For true realism, get one of your cohorts to do a really bad Dick Van Dyke accent and say "Oo! Flippin' 'eck!" a lot.
Posted by: kafkaesque on August 28, 2002 12:05 PM
I punch a small girl in her kidneys.
Doesn't stop the hiccups, but it does maintain a strong dong presence in the room.
Holy moly. I did a google for "hiccup cure," and by golly, this one worked. First time I tried, no more hiccups.
I am liberated!
Posted by: adampsyche on August 28, 2002 12:07 PM
I always felt bad for Julie Andrews having to listen to Dick Van Dyke's bad cockney accent every day on set.
Posted by: witchstone on August 28, 2002 12:37 PMOh 'appiness is bloomin'
All around 'er
The daffoldils are smilin'
At the dove
When Mary 'olds your 'and
You feel so grand
Your 'eart starts beatin'
Like a big brass band
Oh, it's a jolly holiday with Mary
No wonder that it's Mary that we love!
Actually, Van Dyke could get a run for his money against Heather Graham in From Hell. Bleedin' 'orrible it was!
Posted by: kafkaesque on August 28, 2002 12:53 PMBritish accents may be going out of fashion.
I was with my hubby, who's a Brit, in a grocery store in Tennessee. The clerk looks me straight in the eye and says, "I like your accent. Where're you from?" So hubby pipes up and says, "England." And the clerk says, "No, I like HER accent. Where're YOU from?" And I smiled and replied, "Kaintucky," as hubby sulked his way back to the car.
Posted by: tizzie on August 28, 2002 01:00 PMAll right, no one else has bothered to set up the straight line:
*ahem*
What's a titfer?
Posted by: Crash on August 28, 2002 01:01 PMI have been debating on renting that movie, but I doubt I will.
Posted by: adampsyche on August 28, 2002 01:01 PMIt wasn't too terribly awful apart from Heather Graham. But neither was it great.
Posted by: kafkaesque on August 28, 2002 01:04 PM* ignoring Crash *
If you don't like Mary Poppins, you probably won't like Chitty Chitty Bang Bang either - although that soundtrack has even more earworms, IMO.
Posted by: yhbc on August 28, 2002 01:05 PMI rented Resident Evil the other night, and couldn't finish it. Don't ask what made me rent it. I plead insanity.
Posted by: adampsyche on August 28, 2002 01:15 PMWhats a titfer
Nursing infants. Holding up my bra. And foreplay.
My sense of humour is so pleurile sometimes
Posted by: romakimmy on August 28, 2002 01:19 PMI was gonna say leverage, but thought better of it.
Posted by: dong resin on August 28, 2002 01:22 PMSpeaking of Chitty (and I was, wasn't I?), one of my favorite posessions is an original one of these. Sadly, one of the kids and the front and back fins were lost long ago - who knew about "mint-in-box" condition when you were a kid?
Posted by: yhbc on August 28, 2002 01:22 PM(Psst, Adam--I rented Crossroads. Don't tell. I can't plead insanity, but there may have been pot involved.)
Posted by: brittney on August 28, 2002 01:25 PM[curmudgeon]
Don't you lazy ne'er do-wells have anything better to do than hang out here all day, flinging poo and bein' smart alecks? Get a job, you slackers. If you have a job, get a new one! Fer feck's sake, all I do *grumble grumble* and the thanks I *grumble grumble* these damn *grumble grumble*
[/curmudgeon]
Posted by: readymade
on
August 28, 2002 01:30 PM
Ha! I could see renting that if I was blitzed, but what on earth made you pass up Getting There - Sweet 16 and Licensed to Drive?
Posted by: adampsyche on August 28, 2002 01:34 PMI rented Crossroads
Ralph Macchio kicks so much ass.
Posted by: kafkaesque on August 28, 2002 01:35 PMSo when do we get to the Aussie slang? Seeing as you all are as mad as a cut snake....:P
Posted by: romakimmy on August 28, 2002 01:40 PMtizzie's married to a brit?
*seethes with jealousy*
Posted by: witchstone on August 28, 2002 02:05 PMtizzie's married to a brit?
Yes, ma'am, and he's an absolutely wonderful find in the husband department. Couldn't be happier. I threw away the receipt.
Posted by: tizzie on August 28, 2002 02:43 PMtizzie's husband is married to a woman with a Kentucky accent?
*seethes with jealousy, while maintaining stiff upper lip*
I always thought that Ralph Macchio should've combined Crossroads with the Karate Kid films and done a movie where a misguided young man hooks up with old, cantankerous but wise blues-singing martial arts master.
*whips out acoustic guitar and begins rousing rendition of "Roundhouse Kick to the Head Blues"*
Posted by: jonmc on August 28, 2002 03:06 PM*sits down to the telly with a packet of crisps. hums Football's coming home. ignores all the bleedin' gets outside my semi-detached*
Posted by: octobersurprise on August 28, 2002 03:10 PM"get" is spelled "git"
Same in Kentucky as it is in Britain!
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