9622.net

this pic moved inside thread to keep people from being stared at at work.--ed
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It's not technically a Christmas Carol, but my favorite song for this time of year is Tom Waits' A Sight for Sore Eyes:

hey sight for sore eyes it's a long time no see
workin hard hardly workin hey man you know me
water under the bridge didya see my new car
well it's bought and it's payed for parked outside of the bar
and hey barkeeper what's keepin you keep pourin drinks
for all these palookas hey you know what i thinks
that we toast to the old days and dimagio too
and old drysdale and mantle whitey ford and to you

no the old gang ain't around everyone has left town
'cept for thumm and giardina said they just might be down
oh half drunk all the time and i'm all drunk the rest
yea monk's till the champion but i'm the best

i guess you heard about nash he was killed in a crash
hell that must of been two or three years ago now
yea he spun out and he rolled he hit a telephone pole
and he died with the radio on
no she's married and with a kid finally split up with sid
he's up north for a nickle's worth for armed robbery

hey i'll play you some pin ball hell you ain't got a chance
well then go on over and ask her to dance

It's almost the same tune as Auld Lang Syne, and it gets me every time.

Also, The Pogues' Fairytale of New York, now made that much more poignant with the loss of Kirsty MacColl.

i love love love (did I mention that I love?) Low's Just Like Christmas. it's wintry, wonderful, and has very little to do with Dec 25th.

oh - Bright Eyes' "if winter ends" is wonderful, too. makes me want to kill myself, but if that was a negative attribute, "great music" would consist of "Brazil".

Just thinking about that low record today. It's great if you want something a bit different for the holidays. Also heard a review of the Phil Spector Christmas record from 1963 which has some killer bands and songs on it. I had heard many of them before but I didn't realize they were all part of the Spector compilation. Hey migs, what do you mean evan made you do it? Tell him to get his sorry ass over here.

Hey migs, what do you mean evan made you do it? Tell him to get his sorry ass over here.

Common, Ev not even a comment in your own thread...

My input to your question, something warm.

Christmas carrols, Peace on Earth/ Drummer Boy with David Bowie & Bing Crosby. sniff sniff, brings little ice tears to my eyes with joy when I hear it

Real cowboys don't need chin straps to hold their hats on.

Also, real cowboys wear boxers. Flannel ones. Preferably plaid.

Clearly this guy just got lost on his way to audition for the off-off-off-Broadway run of "Village People, the Musical!"

I still love the music from A Charlie Brown Christmas, and John & Yoko's Happy Christmas/War is Over. Call me sentimental.

And I think that goofball in his undies is from Cincinnati. Go figure.

I still love the music from A Charlie Brown Christmas...

You beat me to it, tizzie!

Could be a winter song, though it's really not. For obvious reasons it spends most of the last quarter of the year making merry in my mind. "Thanksgiving" by Poi Dog Pondering:

Somehow I find myself far out of line
from the ones I had drawn
Wasn't the best of paths, you could attest to that,
but I'm keeping on.
Would our paths cross if every great loss
had turned out our gain?
Would our paths cross if the pain it had cost us
was paid in vain?
There was no pot of gold, hardly a rainbow
lighting my way
But I will be true to the red, black and blues
that colored those days.

I owe my soul to each fork in the road,
each misleading sign.
'Cause even in solitude, no bitter attitude
can dissolve my sweetest find

Thanksgiving for every wrong move that made it right.

I also second the Pogues "Fairytale of New York," possibly the greatest xmas song ever written (not saying much, I can't stand xmas songs.)

Also, if you get a chance, try on a little "Christmas Time In the LBC" by Jimmy Kimmel (LOFI Version Here NSFW). "You like this present ho? I wrapped it nice with a bow."

Merle Haggard's "If We Make It Through December" is good and depressing.

Bille Holiday singing "I've Got My Love To Keep Me Warm" always makes me want to snuggle up by a fire.

And if thirds are allowed around here, I'd like to third Fairytale of New York. Heartily.

Bille Holiday singing "I've Got My Love To Keep Me Warm" always makes me want to snuggle up by a fire.

And if thirds are allowed around here, I'd like to third Fairytale of New York. Heartily.

I guess I just fourthed it too.

Sniff. All my good 'uns have already been mentioned, especially "Fairytale of New York". For anybody - ahem - "collecting" Christmas songs, I would recommend anything by Kemper Crabb (warning: .wav file), especially "Good King Wenceslaus", which is probably the best version of that old chestnut I've ever heard.

That durn new person snuck in there and made me fifth it.

Guess I need to get another fifth!

"Merle Haggard's "If We Make It Through December" is good and depressing."

That it is. It's also the song that has been stuck in my head pretty much every December for the last seventeen years or so.

Funny man commish. Funny man.
sniff sniff
Quite appropriate for that iteration of Bowie.

Sorry, yhbc. Well, at least I've got my love to keep me warm. Oh, wait...

Jeez, I know Metallica's not as popular as they used to be but i didn't know Hetfield had fallen so far...

as for best Christmas song...'Christmas(Bay Please Come Home)' has always been a favorite and Springsteens live "Santa Claus is Coming To Town: too.

On a side note, I was in a coffee shop the other day where they were playing "All I Want For Christmas is my Two-Front Teeth" in a letter perfect group harmony rendition without any of the lisping or the goofy voice.

Seems wrong somehow.

Speaking of football (the American kind), I'm sure that all of you are very happy to know that Ricky Williams' touchdown just a little bit ago put me into the Conference Championship game.

Yay, me!

I think my fave xmas song is the take off of "IronMan". I can't remember who does it, but it has the line "I AM SANTA CLAUS!" in the best of heavy metal traditions. It's very funny and makes me laugh every year. But for the life of me, I can't remember the name or the performer. I like spoof seasonal songs better than most of the tradtional faves...especially since they've started playing xmas music at Halloween now. Sheesh.

For serious songs, I think my fave is "In Excelsius Deo". (Although, my Latin is rusty, and I can't remember the words in anything but English anymore. Sigh.)

2000 Miles by the Pretenders is all I can think of right now.

Gah! I go into stores and want to tear my hair out as soon as I hear those jolly tunes. I can't think of one that appeals.

Wait, maybe that one that goes....no, sorry. I've got nothing.

A devilishly handsome (and in-jokes-amongst-old-buddies-laden) x-mas mix I created last year :

Mojo Nixon - Christmas, Christmas
Spinal Tap - Christmas With The Devil
Crash Test Dummies - The First Noel
Darlene Love - Christmas (Baby Please Come Home)
Dean Martin - Baby, It's Cold Outside
Galaxie 500 - Listen, The Snow Is Falling
John Lennon & Yoko Ono - Happy Christmas (War Is Over)
Nat King Cole - The Christmas Song
Payolas - Christmas Is Coming
Pogues feat. Kirsty McColl - Fairytale of New York
Pretenders - 2000 Miles
Ramones - Merry Christmas
Run DMC - Christmas In Hollis
Booker T. & The MG's - Silver Bell
Squirrel Nut Zippers - Santa Claus is Smoking Reefer
The Drifters - The Christmas Song
The Kinks - Father Christmas
Tom Waits - Christmas Card From A Hooker In Minneapolis
Waitresses - Christmas Wrapping
Weezer - The Christmas Song (Japan Green Album)
Bob and Doug McKenzie - Twelve Days of Christmas

Isn't Winter stronger than Xmas or Channukah? Xmas and Chanukah are too damn cheerful; they're like a sorry pep talk. We want cold and loneliness and despair.

and booze. lots and lots of booze.

Dean Martin, Let it Snow.

Nothing less than that.

and booze. lots and lots of booze.

...and one of those light visors that help fend off Seasonal Affective Disorder.

I'm not religious, but my favorite "traditional" Christmas-type songs are "Oh Night Divine" and "We Three Kings of Orient Are." I like the Christmas songs with the sort of sad, haunting melodies, myself.

As for albums, you can't go wrong with Etta James' 12 Christmas Songs. And those Andy Williams, Perry Como, and Bing Crosby collections aren't bad, either.

I was just thinking of Bing, pardonyou. Every year I swear I'll get some of his Xmas stuff.

My mom Loved Andy Williams with a Capital L. She played his records until they wore through on the great big hi-fi in the living room. It was the only piece of furniture in the house that kids were never allowed to touch.

I imagine that if I heard an Andy record now, I could "name that tune" in less than five notes.

Judas Priest's "Devil's Child" never fails to give me a lift when my Seasonal Affective Disorder acts up.

It's sort of the anti-"Little Drummer Boy." Bah-rum-ba-bum-BUM!

I know that this crowd is the anti-Counting Crows, but my favorite song for this time of year is A Long December (probably because December is always so long for me, and I hate winter, and I'm tired of Christmas, bah humbug):

Drove up to Hillside Manor sometime after two a.m.
And talked a little while about the year
I guess the winter makes you laugh a little slower,
Makes you talk a little lower about the things you could not show her
And its been a long December, and there's reason to beleive
Maybe this year will be better than the last
I can't remember all the times I tried to tell myself
To hold on to these moments as they pass
And it's one more day up in the canyon
And it's one more night in Hollywood
It's been so long since I've seen the ocean..I guess I should.

Oh, and by the way, I've been this close ---> X to the Naked Cowboy. He played on the street in Salt Lake and Everyone was Scandalized. Looks like he's gotten his hair trimmed.

Very Small Testicles.

I like Einstein on the Beach, witchstone, and I really like that it was "too happy" to get on anything but the DGC Rareties CD. Cool early Sundays track on there, too. I kind of enjoyed what CC did on their "Unplugged" show, too, as tired as the "Unplugged" thing was. They did an innovative job of it. Good stuff.

On the other hand, I couldn't really get into the CD after 'August and..." Something about Satellites? Did they really think they could get away with a non-mopey album? But 'August' was standard fare for any type of a coffeeshop person in the '90s.

Off the Xmas topic, I bought the best of Johnny Cash a while back. I'm not a huge country person, except for alternative stuff like the Rev Horton Heat and the Supersuckers and Tenderloin-- but you can't go wrong with the Man in Black.

Very Small Testicles.

"The ... the water was cold..!"
-Geo. Costanza

Like a very small Hercules, but with a different weak spot.

..er Achilles? Or Samson, yeah. Samsung! What?

Samsung!

I think we need a modesty screen.

Actually, if you feel like going through the 9622archives, there is a thread where I express my hidden love for Counting Crows, and that song, Long December has a lot to do with it. It's one of those "wrench your heart out of your chest with out you realizing it" songs.

Schubert's Die Winterreise... *sob!*

My brother has an instrumental version of Frosty the Snowman done by the Tijuana Brass.

only version of that song I like.

And then there's that festive Ben Folds Five song, Brick. That next to Long December would pretty much make you put Dr. Kevorkian on your speed dial.

Joni Mitchell
Album Blue
Song River

It's coming on Christmas
They're cutting down trees
They're putting up reindeer
And singing songs of joy and peace
Oh I wish I had a river
I could skate away on
But it don't snow here
It stays pretty green
I'm going to make a lot of money
Then I'm going to quit this crazy scene
I wish I had a river
I could skate away on
I wish I had a river so long
I would teach my feet to fly
Oh I wish I had a river
I could skate away on
I made my baby cry

He tried hard to help me
You know, he put me at ease
And he loved me so naughty
Made me weak in the knees
Oh I wish I had a river
I could skate away on
I'm so hard to handle
I'm selfish and I'm sad
Now I've gone and lost the best baby
That I ever had
Oh I wish I had a river
I could skate away on
I wish I had a river so long
I would teach my feet to fly
Oh I wish I had a river
I made my baby say goodbye...

Damn italics.

I agree. Damn italics and their damn italic pron!

I agree. Damn italics and their damn italic pron!

Double damn them!

oh ColdChef... that's a good one.

Actually, Waits' version of Silent Night is purty darn good too.

This time every year, the only Xmas music I can listen to is the John Denver and the Muppets Christmas Together album. yes, on vinyl.

It's not easy being green.

Oh, and I have to 27th the Fairytale of New York. Even No Use For A Name (who I loathe, even more after seeing them cover "Redemption Song") does a decent cover of it on this comp.

For my Christmas mix cd this year, I have Cyndi Lauper singing a duet of "Here Comes Santa Claus" with Frank Sinatra.

It's good shit.

I also have "The First Noel" by Emmylou Harris and (because I am a bastard to those I love) "Mele Kelikimaka" sung by Jimmy Buffet.

how could you guys forget madonna singing 'santa baby?'

truly a classic.

Gimme Eartha Kitt over Madonna anyday.

Mmmmmmm...Eartha Kitt over Madonna...oh, baby...

Actually, Elvis' Blue Christmas is a good one too.

Or

I'm Mister White Christmas
I'm Mister Snow
I'm Mister Icicle
I'm Mister Ten Below
Friends call me Snow Miser,
What ever I touch
Turns to snow in my clutch
I'm too much!

[Chorus]
He's Mister White Christmas
He's Mister Snow

[Snow Miser]
That's right!

[Chorus]
He's Mister Icicle
He's Mister Ten Below

[Snow Miser]
Friends call me Snow Miser,
What ever I touch
Turns to snow in my clutch

[Chorus]
He's too much!

[Snow Miser]
I never want to see a day
That's over forty degrees
I'd rather have it thirty,
Twenty, ten, five and let it freeeeEEEEEEeeze!

[Chorus]
He's Mister White Christmas
He's Mister Snow

[Snow Miser]
That's right!

[Chorus]
He's Mister Icicle
He's Mister Ten Below

[Snow Miser]
Friends call me Snow Miser,
What ever I touch
Turns to snow in my clutch
... too much.

[Everybody]
Too Much!

"Call Mr. Plow, that's my name! That name again is Mr. Plow."

The Grinch. Boris Karloff.

Which brings us to the Boris Karloff Life Mask. Creepy.

More than just painted, each mask is hand finished by a (down-on-his-luck, poor old) retired Hollywood film studio prop builder.

perhaps my sarcasm is lost around here. has someone seen it?

one of my favorites:

*thrashes self with computer cables for missing said sarcasm*

Here's what you do: use the inline tag "~" when you are being sarcastic. That way everyone will know that you aren't bopping away to "Papa Don't Preach" every night after work. Not that there'd be anything wrong with that if you were.

The wonderful and altruistic Frykitty explains in this little blurb.

Hence: ~truly a classic~

Oh don't try to back out of it now, G. You love Madonna. Just admit it.

Liking Madonna is way punk rock.

Liking Avril Levigne is way punk rock, too.

~wink~

I was flipping channels last night and I saw Avril Lavigne perform live. Very punk. She performed her #1 Hit (or whatever) SK8ER BOY (or 'SK8TER BOY'? But isn't the 'T' redundant?) She's 733T, too, eh? A huge audience of young girls, obviously hand-picked for their cuteness and passionate love of Avril, were demonstrated in extreme close-up singing and knowing all the lyrics to her songs. One particular attractive young black girl got the close-up constantly as she beamed directly into the camera (not at the stage) and gave the two-finger devil sign.

Very punk. Avril even sang off key, and I think the guitars were out of tune.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

wait one moment!!!

i will never use a sarcasm tag, as that would be insulting to you, my beloved public.

let this not sully madonna's sweet reputation, i think she's punk as fuck. the reason i know of her rendition of santa baby is that when i was in 10th grade me and my friends did a tribute to madonna at the school's holiday party. someone sang have yourself a merry little christmas, and i danced to express yourself. the one girl among us who had enough wherewithal to get a boyfriend made him dress up as santa, and for the finale, we all sang santa baby to him.

liking sk8er bois is way punk rock too.

that said: 'santa baby' is a horrible song. almost unlistenable.

i feel that i've posted this story here before. that's really pathetic, no?

When you were in tenth grade, you sang Madonna songs. When I was in tenth grade, so was Madonna.

It's hard to decide which is more punk rock.

Best Xmas rock and roll ever:

"Sock It To Me, Santa" by Bob Seger and the Last Heard (1966).

"Christmas just won't be a drag
Santa's Got A Brand New Bag..."

tizzie is punk as fuck.

(i'm really hoping that shows up on googlism tiz...)

Heh, this thread somehow reminded me to look for a cool Santa Claus Bobblehead. In the process of finding this, I found this unlikely nodder. Heh.

I'm easily amused.

9622: Heh. I'm Easily Amused.

Why am I such a misfit? I am not just a nitwit.
You can't fire me I quit, since I don't fit in.
Why am I such a misfit? I am not just a nitwit.
Just because my nose glows, why don't I fit in?

Just fulfilling my Aspiring-Dentist Elf Quote quota.

Bob Seger is punk as fuck. Proof.

Oh, and also, for whatever reason, I always associate Fleetwood Mac's "Sara" with long dark drives in wintry countryside. Very ethereal and magic, etc. etc. One of those songs that takes my back to childhood in a split-second. Ahhh... nostalgic reverie, pardon me while I close my eyes and pretend I'm not a grown-up.

Oh man! That site has Tortured Souls! I love that set.

Anyone remember the Bob Seger throat cancer rumors from '82?

alright, who remembers 1982?

jon, that flyer is too funny. I grew in St. Clair Shores, and those directions lead you to within a half mile of the house of slack.

My sister used to work at the SCS civic arena concessions. It's also where my high school hockey team played.

freaky

9622: tizzie is punk as fuck.

hehehe

By that criteria just about anyone is punk as fuck. Jon can you elaborate on the differnce between "punk" and "punk as fuck" please, with examples. Thank you.

1982? I was in 7th grade, getting ostracized by the cool kids and having weird new thoughts about my heretofore "icky" female classmates.

tj: Michigan is the unheralded home of some great hard rock history. I blogged about it a while back.

Wait wait wait!

Joe Jackson is punk as fuck? I need a slide rule for this.

I did see Jesus and Mary Chain open for Iggy Pop. And they are in fact punk as fuck.

The Zambonis are funk as puck.

hee hee

The Zambonis are funk as puck.

hee hee

Doubleposting is punk as fuck.

Pssst. Miguel is now up to 2500 MeFi comments. Hoo boy.

'82 was when I first heard that Bob Seger was in fact dying of throat cancer. Yes, I was 11-12 years old. It kept up for a few years after that.

Trippy. Someone talk me down. ;)

Actually, Elvis' Blue Christmas is a good one too.

I was going through my record collection, and noticed one of my christmas-cheesy-disney-child themed record I had growing up as a kid contained a song sung by Elvis.....I had no clue as a kid because I did't care for the record so I never noticed Elvis performed this tune on it, Silver Bells or Silent Night, if I remember right. That alone makes the record worth keeping.

She performed her #1 Hit (or whatever) SK8ER BOY (or 'SK8TER BOY'? But isn't the 'T' redundant?)

that's fucking terrible.

i'm so glad i skated when it was cool.

yeah, we ruined it for everyone.

and the big pants were a little overboard. i'm glad that's over.

Michigan is the unheralded home of some great hard rock history.

Was (Not Was)'s "Christmas Time in the Motor City is a great Christmas song. It's off the Ze Record's Christmas Album, the origin of the Waitresses "Christmas Wrapping" as well as forgotten gems like Suicide's "Hey Lord" and Cristina's "Things Fall Apart". For those who like a more traditional, avant-disco Xmas.

Any chance whitey-tighty-snowy guitar guy is gonna move over to the right anytime soon? I think the co-workers are starting to think I have an unusual fetish.

I think the co-workers are starting to think I have an unusual fetish.

I've had a few stares today, too. I've been tempted to post just to move him over...

he's kind of growing on me. he's sort of cute, no?

I think we need a modesty screen.
Posted by: tizzie on December 10, 2002 10:53 AM

undie boy + co-workers = bad.

and the big pants were a little overboard. i'm glad that's over.

Not in Texas, ug....... :(
Everytime I go back home to Southern Cali that is one of the eye candies for me, no super-baggy-dumpy-looking-tatered-pant-leg-ends that are trailing 2 feet behind the young folks walking about. Everyonce in while you hear of kid in Dallas tripping and breaking an arm wearing these dread of threads.

I think the co-workers are starting to think I have an unusual fetish.

Back to the bestiality suspicions, then.

Ya didn't have to remove the picture...just replace it with something wholesome and decent...like nuns, perhaps

Ya didn't have to remove the picture...just replace it with something wholesome and decent...like nuns, perhaps

If you stare, you'll realize that tightywhitey gots cameltoe. That's probably what causes that whistful look on his face.

Bob Seger.

How can two little names be so painful to even read?

Migs, I implore you as a monkey brotha, ignore the earnest balladeer you associate with the name and check out his 1965-72 era stuff. The guys in the MC5 have long said they considered Bob a role model and freind. Plus, at his best, he can write "heartland rock" sons as well as Springsteen or Mellencamp and is a far better singer. Plus he wrote the first(1968) rock song explicitly attacking the Vietnam War.

So of you'll excuse me:

"I still remember it was autumn and the moon was shinin'
Our sixtey Cadillac was roaring through Nebraska whinin'
Doin, a hundreed twenty man the fields was bendin' over
Headin' out for the mountains knowin' we was trav'lin further
All the fires was blazin' and the spinnin' wheels were turnin' turnin'
Had my girl beside me, brother, she was burnin' burninn"

Yet another instance where Miguel is profoundly right.

jonmc: 9622's tireless defender of the terminally unhip.

Sadly, dancing to a slow song was a necessary prelude to kissing girls as a teenager, even a teenager as punk as fuck as myself. In the late '70s "We've Got Tonight" was about as gritty a slow number as was available for this purpose. I can't disown it now, nor "Still the Same", though "That Old Time Rock & Roll" was always rotten all the way through.

"Ramblin' Gamblin' Man" "East Side Story" "Get Out Of Denver" "Travelin' Man" 'Persecution Smith" "Heavy Music" "Turn The Page" "Feel Like A Number"...

These are the songs you should judge Seger by, good solid slabs of Detroit rock and roll. That's my opinion and I'm stickin' to it.

I hereby renounce Bob Seger, and his Silver Bullet band's Detroit cred.

I must argue with Jonmc regarding the "Turn the Page:" it's Spinal Tap from Detroit instead of "Laverne and Shirley" and "The Simpsons." I give you Exhibit A:

out there in the spotlight, you're a million miles away
every ounce of energy, you try to give away
and the sweat pours from your body, like the music that you play

So, he's a martyr, doin' it all for the fans...it's so sweet! It might be the song I refer to most often when I think of stars who suffer for their "art." I think it's HI-larious. (Not to say that artists don't suffer for their art, just not usually in so overt a "poor me, look at all I do for you little people" fashion).

But jonmc, you are well respected in my book for so artfully and soulfully defending the right to rock. Viva la difference!

jonmc: 9622's tireless defender of the terminally unhip

I don't get all this blather about being hip or unhip. Some people like Seger, some people don't. It's not a matter of hipness or oppression of certain types of music.

There are no "cool kids" here, and frankly I don't really see how it's a good thing to set up some kind of opposition that doesn't even exist in the first place.

What a dork.

Whatever.

Whatever.

I forgot these:
~What a dork.~

And I thought I was becoming one of the cool kids. Dammit.

See, we're hip precisely because we know how unhip we are. But that makes us geeks, because our self-awareness renders any hipness because of unhipness unhip again. But we're hiply unhip which is hip, except with the cool people, who think we're uncool. But since we know how uncool they are for being cool, we in turn are rendered into hipness again.

Simple, right?

And in no way was my Seger post to declare anyone unhip. I just think that song is funny.
*sidles up to kafkaligari and jonmc, looks moonily up at them, and asks for forgiveness of any unwitting slight*
*decides it's better to grovel, and gets down on the floor prostrate*
*likes it so much down there that get myself a beer, and wallow a bit in the dust bunnies*

I was just kidding around. Didn't mean to start a controversy. i just seem to always be declaiming the virtues of stuff nobody but me likes. Self-Effacing humor. And I do get passionate about music. But one of these days i'll open my mouth and fall right in, probably.

Sorry.

Besides, the "affable, out-of-it and proud-of-it dork" persona is more or less what I'm like in person. The last thing I was doing was attacking my monkey crew, specially you, Kaf. You're one of my blogging inspirations, remember?

It's hip to be square!

Or not. I'd rather be happy than rich. Would you like to touch it? All aboard the Monkeytrain!

We all need a little ~~~~~~

Cripes, you monkeys have been busy around here.

Just got back from the office Christmas (yeah - Christmas, we don't care who we alieinate) Party, which was a wonderful opportunity to dirnk my boss' beer and eat a whole whompin' mess of stuffed mushrooms, meatballs and scallops wrapped in bacon (which are, surprisingly, completely non-caloric and cholesterolic (is that a word?) if you eat them standing up).

I'm not even going to try to go through everything from today tonight, but did anyone else notice that perhaps Settle is back? (scroll up a couple of comments to see KettleBlack's then most recent outburst). Sure sounds liek the same annoying little bipolar dude to me! (and with the same o

Yeah he was spazzing in mefi IRC earlier. Not pretty. Quonsar flicked boogers and farted on him but it didn't work. Oh yeah, then quonz turned into Jeff Beck. totally hip.

Funny how settle quotes The Man Who Sold The World, fits his personality.

Yet another reason I need to figure out IRC. I'll have to break down at some point and load up that mozilla-thingy, because every other way I've tried I can't get to work.

I would have loved to have seen Quonsar flick boogers on Settle in real time.

And on review, apparently I drnak too much of my boss' beer.

Heh. Here, too. Kinda comical, till someone's eye gets poked out. (It'll happen.)

Hmm... KettleBlack's comments have been removed from the "here" link I posted in the above comment.

I've decided I'm going to create a new Christmas treat: Naked Cowboy Jingle Balls.

Should they be cheesy or sweet?

Schweaty Balls?

Should they be cheesy or sweet?

I do not know the answer to that question. I have a friend who tasted "rocky mountain oysters" at a farm once, maybe I could get his opinion.

I think maybe we should have a 9622 X-mas baked goods swap, though. Mail me some Jingle Balls and I'll gladly send you some tea brack (e.g.) (carb's and caffeine all at once!)

Not only can this be presented as a loaf but you can also fashion it into a Christmas cake !

Or you can wear it as a jaunty hat!

Not only can this be presented as a loaf but you can also fashion it into a Christmas cake !

Eh, my brack is just a big ugly lump. But it tastes good and gives you a caffeine buzz.

9622: My Brack is just a Big Ugly Lump

My Brack is just a Big Ugly Lump

Sounds like a personal problem. 9622: Sounds like a personal problem.

Hey. No taglining your own comments.

Now get off my lawn, you damn kids.

Unless you want to hold fishing rods and chase frogs.

And wear little red vests.

Can I just root around for grubs?

Settle is back?

....I'm banned from the blue, my workload is way too heavy right now. Damn I could use a chuckle, especially now and I'm missing it....

9622: fishing rods, chasing frogs, and wearing little red vests.
(It's got a beat. Say it to yourself and see!)

Is that better, Kaf?

...my workload is way too heavy right now.

Same here, TCS, I need to shut Explorer down for a while. That and eye strain.

You need to get some vizine on those babys pronto, shane.

And tcs, I admire your ability to self-ban yourself ("allow myself to introduce ... myself"). If I had that kind of willpower who knows how productive I'd be.

You young whippersnappers, tagline this, tagline that. Why, in my day, we only made a tagline for one reason: it was good. Or if someone paid us money. Or gave us free sex. Okay, so three reasons. But that was it!

9622: will tagline for free sex.

Okay, I'm going to do some work now.

No, really. I swear to God I'm going to shut this thing down and do some work...right... now. No, really, I'm clicking the 'x' now. I'm doin' it.
I can do this. really. I can go radio silence and do my job.
I. Can. Turn. Off. The Internet.
Anytime I want to, really.
Okay... clicking...
...
.

And tcs, I admire your ability to self-ban yourself......how productive I'd be.

pardon me, it has been easy of late. Unfortunately ;(

but not here;) too many tastie bananas... ;O

G500 "Listen, the Snow is falling." Yes! Also, The Kinks' "Father Christmas." "Do they know it's Christmas" gets my vote for most pretentious Christmas song. Whenever I hear it I want to shout "No! Because they're fucking Muslims!" Around here a local band--I can't think of their name just now--does a version of "Jingle Bells" to the tune of AC/DC's "Hell's Bells" which always puts me in the spirit.

o
Yeah, I thought the same thing. If he starts talking about the golden spiral, we'll know for sure. Still, I gotta say, Settle's one of the few Mefites who actually made me snort beer out of my nose laughing.

Okay, I'm going to do some work now.

Hell, I'm on my vacation. But my home computer isn't working so I came in to work just for the hot monkey love.

I can quit anytime I want. Really.

good lord shane...where did you find that picture? And please, oh please, tell me that someone didn't actually tattoo their love handles like that.

Eeek.

And speaking of tighty-whitey boy...I'm so glad someone besides me noticed that he seems to have no um, visible equipment...like a Ken doll that boy is. I mean, I know it's cold and he's standing mostly naked in the snow, but sheesh...

It's obvious he's tucking. He would have to, for insurance purposes.

9622.net: Tucking, for insurance purposes.

witchstone, tucking for insurance of what? health insurance? life insurance? collision?

I was just thinking "Hey, there probably are a lot of people who would want to kick the Naked Cowboy in the crotchal area."

It's obvious he's tucking.

Tucking? What the hell? Where do you tuck it? You stretch it out and stick it someplace? Is this possible--? Wait, don't tell me (or link to photos) if it is. I guess maybe you could duck tape it down around back between your ass cheeks, but really, wouldn't that hurt like hell? Or is it like that comedy sketch I saw, where they had a well-hung ballet troupe with them "tucked" in spirals down around their legs?

De, I think it really is a tattoo by this guy. These are cool, too--I thought they were selling glass eyes at first. I'd like a glass eye. Just to play with, maybe two, like those Chinese balls, you know?

Sheesh. I broke radio silence for "tucking." I'm back to work now, or I won't be able to take tomorrow off.

Perhaps he's insured the "package" itself? After all, Jennifer Lopez (a.k.a. "J. Lo", a.k.a. "J. to Tha Lo", a.k.a. "Jenny From the Block") was rumored to have insured her prodigious booty. And Mary Hart had her legs insured.

And I still laugh every time I see the picture and think about Chef's description of the "whistful" look on his face.

i can't believe you don't know how to tuck.

yeah, dude, didn't you see The Silence of the Lambs?

and "midnight in the garden of good and evil." i think there was a tucking discourse in there, too.

One does not tuck and then walk around with legs akimbo like our cowboy compatriot above, trust me. Not without, as Shane suggests, duct tape.

Maybe he's just got an angry inch. Or half inch.

or....

maybe s/he's saving up for the rest of the operation.

witchy, babe, check your e-mail.

Christmas songs! Nobody has said "White Christmas," by the Drifters, excellent harmonies. "Merry Christmas, Baby," by Otis Redding," "Mele Kalikimaka," by Bing Crosby (with the Andrews sisters!) NOT Jimmy Buffet. (I mean, Jimmy Buffet? Is it O.K. now to even say "Jimmy Buffet"?) And Adam (above) is dead-on with Dean Martin's "Let It Snow" -- almost as good as his completely hammered "Winter Wonderland." I swear he passes out at the end of his take. By the way: Anybody interested in swapping Christmas songs?

Have you heard this record?

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