9622.net

Click to enlarge, indeed.

Fnaarrr.

Is serious/pseudo-sexy really the right look to go for when you're wearing a shirt that says "Got Monkey?"

Maybe if you add some Brass, Cyrano.

I will only wear a hat that makes it look like a monkey is humping my head if everyone else promises to wear one too.

This seems like a big deal, but they don't look as silly as fezzes do, and that seems to have taken off.

And hey, Monkey Head.

Also: "Thundersluts." heh.

There's only one reason to wear a fez.

what'choo talkin' bout, monkeys?

Cute smiling monkies or no, hot pink polyester is an undergarment blasphemy worthy of at least the 8th circle of hell.

And only six shopping days until my birthday! What a happy coincidence.

Your Birth-day tizzie...hmmm. Guys she did say something about needing a mirror a couple of days ago...here is a monkey holder for a mirror.

It's makes the mirror become a scented monkey mirror, oh dear as monkey scent may not be too refreshing...oh poo.

But maybe it's not poo, but rather ... Monkey Musk.

Or Chateau Chimp.

Or Primate Passion!

Or, or Grape Ape!

(rrrAWRRrrr.)

That's enough of these monkey simulacra festooning the noggins of vile pretenders:

I say get a real monkey chapeau:

Now that's a hat!

and more...

aye, kafka, though those jobbies can't be cheap, and they look like they'd get right ornery if you didn't feed 'em.

But hey, if you know a connection to get 'em wholesale in time for the 9622Con, then we just might have ourselves a hatalicious hoedown after all.

had you really never heard 'thundersluts' before?

Honestly? no. Do they have an album out? Are they any good live?

OMG, chico. I can't believe you haven't heard of them. Look at the latest issue of Billboard.

feh. kids today. don't know their history, even when its only a couple monts old.

do we need a faq for 9622 now?

1. it was started at another site, called 'metafilter'. don't go there. people just fight.

2. the people who post here are called 'thundersluts'

3. we are all either lawyers or english majors.

4. we worship portwhatever cult novelist miguel cardosa

5. he left us, but he came back.

Okay, two things:

The first is, the other reason to wear a fez is because of all of the monkeys who wear fezzes.

The second is, when I googled for "monkey fez," I got back an alarming, nay, possibly terrifying number of matches to monkey-products I already own, including this candle which I believe was my first monkey purchase about four years ago.

Oh boy.

You haven't heard of the Thundersluts, man?

Oooh they're dreamy...

**swoons, throws undergarments**

3. we are all either lawyers or english majors.

That's not true! Quonsar and I are both local government slags.

**swoons, throws undergarments**

**catches undergarments**'

e-bay here I come. no more student loans for me!

3. we are all either lawyers or english majors.

Not I, since I have no degree I am therefore majorless.

And stop sniffing my dainties, ufez.

Readymade. I have that candle too!

And the salt & pepper shakers.

look, i'm not a lawyer or an english major either. that was a joke. don't you remember the thread where it *seemed* like everyone was a lawyer or an english major? if coldchef were here he would back me up...

Apologies for not knowing my own history. I'm learning as fast as I can. (I'm still new here, relatively.)

And I don't know if I say this enough, but I think you're all pretty majorly dreamy. The fact that you're thundersluts is merely the fez-icing on the monkeycake.

I shall cast my unmentionables (and copies of my journalism degree, which could be english-ish if you'd let it) at you all, taking careful aim so, y'know, so you can duck.

journalism definitely counts as english! Heck, I count my econ degree as pre-law.

You've gotta be flexible to be a monkey.

I have degrees in english and journalism so I'm, like, and SuperMonkey or something.

I second that, Lupo. You are a supermonkey.

Heck, I count my econ degree as pre-law.

yay! I'm not the only econ dork around here. Can I count it as pre-law too even if I have no intentions of going to law school?

lupo for supermonkey!

go me!

.

absolutely, ufez. in fact, you and I will not go to law school together. sounds like a plan!

Think of the money and time we'll save for fun stuff instead.

*chants*
Lu-po! Lu-po! Lu-po!

*wonders why people in office are staring*

Supermonkey

can you guys make me fit in to my own rule:
math/comp sci with a minor in african studies

Goneill, that is so clearly pre- anti-discrimination law! The math part so you can add up the damages.

And the computer part so you can look stuff up.

How about if half the monkeys sued you and the other half wrote books/articles/blogs about it?

...and I'll prepare a selection of snacks while migs makes cocktails. I mean after all, what's a drink without a nosh?

i will never eat your snack jonmc. never.

that's not true. i'm hoping we can agree on the occasional cadbury's creme egg.

Kaf- I have those salt and pepper shakers too! Are you sure we don't live together?

I have a degree from Evergreen State College, which doesn't have majors. So I have a major in hopeless idealism and cultural obscurity, minor in irrelevance.

Not even Pink Pocky??

*sniff*

I actually had a whole box of that shit for breakfast today, I was so hungry. I'm heading over to Kim's on St.Marks after I get outta here, maybe I'll go to one of the secret supermarkets there and get some wacky asian snax.

I have Modern Lit from a University that had no grades. How 'bout them apples?

I have a degree from Evergreen State College,

I may have mentioned this before, but my cousin went to Evergreen. He's currently the Miguel Cardoso of Olympia, WA. Everyone knows his name.

*bites into apple*

A bit tart, but they'd make a nice pie.

No grades?

Man, even I might've managed to pass!

No grades?

Man, even I might've managed to pass!

For The Benefit of Mr. Kite, post!!

All this food is reminding me how tubby I'm getting. God help me.

Here's a nice monkey film from the MoreMonkey people (which I've probably posted before).

Kaf, no grades for me too! I'm beginning to think that we're not just living together, but that we are in fact the same person.

Very strange sensation, that.

Lupo, when did your bro go there? I knew a lot of people whom everyone knew. Small town.

No grades?

Yeh, but they had "narrative evaluations" which you could really translate into grades by certain key words:

ebullient/astonishing/made me look at granola in a whole new way: A
pleasant/contributed to discussion/thought-provoking: B
adequate/unremarkable/faceless zombie: C
unusual/challenged/not present at even one discussion group:D
who?: F

er, cousin.

So, out with it, Readymade...did you go to UC Santa Cruz too?

Oh. duh. Evergreen.

This sort of total inattentiveness is the result of a non-graded higher edumacation.

Wow. Maybe the reason I flunked out is cause I went to a real school. I gotta think these things through better.

He's currently the Miguel Cardoso of Olympia, WA. Everyone knows his name.

Everybody except us. Who is he?

Lupo has left the building.

I thought of going there, but the Northwest was where I had residency, and, well, I was too lazy to apply. Thought of going there for a Masters too, but, well, too lazy to apply.

Has this been an endless freakin' long day?!? Lucky Lupo.

I had my first grad school audition today. Luckily, I didn't vomit all over them.

Hey!

Hannibal Lecter Monkey!

I apologize for speaking about my personal life. I'll try not to let it happen again, m'lord.

*goes back to butlering*

Oh. heh.

No connection between your personal info and the Lecter monkey.

Good luck on the audition! I hope no-one eats your liver!

I had my first grad school audition today. Luckily, I didn't vomit all over them.

Ah, a little regurgitation never hurt nobody. It may even impress them a bit.

Audition? Does that mean you're, like, talented or something? Wow.

Good good luck. I would have vomited too. I can't even study for the GRE without feeling ill.

Auditioning ain't so bad. It's just a bunch of people in a room with their sole purpose in life being to judge your every movement and action against some arbitrary concept of what they want to hear or see. No biggie.

Vomiting can often close a deal.

The secret to auditions: You are so nervous you completely flub some easy combination or pick your leotard wedgie out of your butt to hide the ounce of fat hanging out exactly when the directors are pointing at you with their pencils and staring at you like a bug under a microscope. You are sure you've just screwed your chances for good, so you start to relax and somewhat enjoy the rest of the audition, ignoring those self-important idjits at the front of the room. You even smile a bit.

You get the job/acceptance letter. Easy, no?*

*based on years of ballet auditions. YMMV

That sounds exactly like how I got kicked out of the boy scouts, romakimmy.

You too dong?

This thread reached its peak when witchstone used "tart" and "pie" in the same sentence.

Apropos of nothing, I just made a blueberry pie.

Anybody else catch that cheesy-to-the-max show where an orangutan pulled a sumo wrestler into the mud-therefore winning the tug of war.

But the chimp lost the obstacle course to the former Navy Seal. But he did look like he had fun.

Meanwhile I think I lost some brain cells watching it all.

Wasn't there some kind of contest with midgets eating an airplane?

Sorry to hear they wouldn't let you finish your tutu merit badge, boys. My condolances.

Ah, a little regurgitation never hurt nobody. It may even impress them a bit.

I say hurl. If you blow chunks and she comes back, she's yours. If you spew and she bolts, then it was never meant to be.

I'm back...sorta. I'm blogging from a secret undisclosed location. (Dick says "hi all".)

My cousin has been in Olympia for 11 years, so he "graduated" (do they "graduate" from that school) around 1996(?). His name is Pat Castaldo. He did some work for some of the indy record labels out there (yo-yo and, i think, kill rock stars). I only recently discovered that he design the cover art for one of my all-time favorite albums, Modest Mouse's Lonesome Crowded West. He founded and owns buyolympia.com.

I have probably just divulged much more personal information about him than he would like me to, but what the hell. He's a hell of a guy. He's a bit younger than me, but in many ways I look up to him.

I'll be back later. I gotta go kick Cheney in the teeth.

Yeah, there were "little people" pulling an airplane. Oh how politically correct. Not.

The elephant won.

Also, amazingly, an Alaskan brown bear can eat hotdogs more quickly than a human. *stop the presses*.

Gash or Tash? Turn sound on. Kinda NSFW.

bunny, I don't want you leaving again so don't click on the following link. Everyone else....break out the lube. NSFW This might deserve it's own thread.

Yeah, there were little people pulling an airplane. Oh how politically correct.

What does "political correctness" have to do with it? It's disgusting.

I can only speak for myself but I don't want to hear any more complaints about how people here are "offensive". the dildo link that "ana unagi" just posted is more tasteful than that piece of shit show.

just my two cents from here in the bunker.

so how 'bout those monkeys? they're funny.

I don't know about yours, but it's cold in my bunker.

Mmmm, blueberry pie.

jpoulos, you missed the "not" behind "politically correct". I'm only five feet tall and was offended as...well, you get the pic.

The chimp at the end of the obstacle course-wish we all could have seen his self-satisfied stance at the end of the course. Big grin too.

So maybe THAT was where Miguel went.....

By the way to set the record straight my HUSBAND was watching the show, and I came into the room only to be mesmerized at how truly awful was. I believe my exact words to him were "The world is officially coming to an end now."

It made Joe Millionaire look like Masterpiece Theatre.

I don't even know what you two are going on about.

j-po, are you implying that the dildo link wasn't tasteful? Mr. Blogfucker. ;-)

Don't be silly, anathema. I loved the dildo link. LOVED it.

dong, you are mentioned by name in that second link.

What dildo link?! I missed the dildo link? Where the hell was I? Was it a monkey? Did I miss anything else important?

My god, I'm panicking.

Look up a bit. It's my "break out the lube" link.

I'm so relieved. Thank you anathema for coming so quickly to my aid.

Speaking of master's, I got my letter of acceptance the other day for the MA program I applied for a couple months ago (MA App Linguistics), and it was the wrong program.

Crap. Why I oughta...

What exactly do you mean "wrong program." So does this mean we don't congratulate you, mr. chicken.

?

Applied Linguistics? Man, if you folks ever got together to play some serious intellectual stickball, I'd be sitting there with my mouth open eating paste.

In other news, I was in this oriental grocery in a basement on St Marks and the two new Pocky Flavors are out: Blueberry Yogurt and Black & Latte. I also got some Banana flvored Lotte gum which if the label is correct is made in Stav's neck of the woods down in seoul. I'll give a tatse test as soon as I cure my sobriety and dance around the room to "Suspicious Minds" a few times.

BTW, Lisa bought me a stuffed gorilla, he's named Sid.

Applied Linguistics? Man, if you folks ever got together to play some serious intellectual stickball, I'd be sitting there with my mouth open eating paste.

In other news, I was in this oriental grocery in a basement on St Marks and the two new Pocky Flavors are out: Blueberry Yogurt and Black & Latte. I also got some Banana flvored Lotte gum which if the label is correct is made in Stav's neck of the woods down in seoul. I'll give a tatse test as soon as I cure my sobriety and dance around the room to "Suspicious Minds" a few times.

BTW, Lisa bought me a stuffed gorilla, he's named Sid.

Martha My Dear, Post, already!!

Oh yeah, Pocky G inna house, mofo...

Oh yeah, Pocky G inna house, mofo...

Babys in Black! Post.

rebar pocky

Well, sorta the right program. Right subject, but not distance mode, which means I'd have to go live in Sydney again, which would rock, but which I can't afford.

Double poop.

(Lotte is the upscale department store chain here, but they also make various foods and brake shoes and condoms and whatever else, like all the Korean chaebol (think kiretsu) that own damn near everything and everyone here. Lotte's parent company actually is Japanese, but I think it's half Korean owned -ish.)

They are big into chewing gum for some weird reason.

your'e all here !
hmmmm, are noobs allowed in these parts ?

All are welcome, sarge.

Cross over, children! There is peace and seerentiy in the light!

Wow. That was either an atrocious typo or a new southeast Asian country.

You'll have to ask Stav about it, maybe he knows.

I KNOW ALL!

Also, this from the pile made me laugh, 'cause I'm a bit of a moron when I'm hungover.

How do you get 100 Canadians out of a swimming pool?

"Please get out of the swimming pool"

Badump tish!

Also : hiya Sarge.

JP, your cousin is showing his monkey roots.

And check out the action on babysock monkey! He's gonna grow up to be a porn star! Oh, wait...

Sock monkey porn on Saturday mornings. It's so special here.

Well, you know, something for the kids.

hmmmm, are noobs allowed in these parts ?

Common sgt. serenity be all you can ie....a noobie, unless you meant boobs, those are fine too with an ie ;)

looks like Matt didn't install the patch.

Looks like Matt didn't install the patch. Or at least his ISP.

No comment.

I was thinking the same thing, ana.

How surprising that there's an exploitable buffer overrun in a Microsoft product, huh?

Christ, even Lexis and Westlaw are down! And I need to do research for a brief. You would think that companies whose bottom lines depend 100% on timely access to information would have dealt with this.

Anyone hear of some virus that is slowing down the net this morning??

I'm at work so mefi is my news..

to keep with the theme of things,

Does anyone need to ask[from the monkey sock]:What would you do if your tail was longer than your legs?

Yes,tcs, a lot of sites are down. A worm attacked over 2000 servers running SQL. "They" say things should be back to normal later today.

back to normal later today.

sheesh...I'll only be at work for a few more hours...

So monkey island isn't good enough for you, Tom?

Big Blue is back up.

Monkey island is great, I was mentioning the slowness of internet, too slow for fun.

that canadian joke i've been telling to canadians far and wide as often as possible for weeks now. it's the only 'joke' i've ever laughed at and memorized and repeated.

Yeah, well, it's funny, eh? Jeez. And, like, she told it well.

Also, it's true.

Just sayin.

Oh. Oh Dear.

Postum!

Postum (is made by Kraft) damn it!

can't.........take..............it.............any........longer

Are you one of those "sexy lawyers" I keep seeing on tv? Or do you just practice "sexy law"? What exactly makes law "sexy," anyway? Inquiring minds want to know (Nice email address....).

My feelings about the server/MT at the moment.

*unable to get any work done until this posts*

*begins reverting to compulsive behaviors*

Remember that Alan Arkin film "Simon?"

This is making me feel ill.

Around these parts you occasionally hear people refer to entertainment and new media law (copyright and trademark etc.) as "sexy" law as opposed to something like estate planning (sorry commish) or tax law or something horrible like family law. I just thought it was funny due to the multiple meanings. I got it the other day along with slapyourass.com
Evan Izer thinks I should get jurisprurience.com while I'm at it.

Yo, sexy - is this your private thread, or can anyone post here? ;)

Oh, and riffola finally told me how to get onto #mefi in a way that I could understand, so now I can hang out with all the cool kids.

'kay?

umm ... fellers?

Hey - where'd everybody go?

Someone hijacked my computer and posted something mean about estate planners.

commish, as soon as I actually have an estate I will be taking back everything I said. ;-)

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