Dennis fiercely guards his poo from unscrupulous poo bandits.
Keep your poo, you toothy bastard!
Posted by: tizzie on February 5, 2003 11:54 AMOh, how cuuuuute! A widdle shitting biting machine! Awwwww.
I, for one, have always considered myself as scrupulous a poo bandit as there is. Like the song goes, it's always good to ask before you go ahead and steal the Devil's Poo.
Posted by: Chico on February 5, 2003 01:02 PM1985: Plans are scrapped for sequel: Smokey and the Scrupulous Poo Bandit.
Posted by: kafkajayhawkins on February 5, 2003 01:30 PMPoor Taz. Since the cancelled his tv show, things just haven't been the same.
Posted by: eyeballkid on February 5, 2003 03:32 PMApropos of the conversation, this is what my husband said this morning:
"Maybe poo wants to be flung..."
Posted by: b****fire on February 5, 2003 03:44 PMThat would be an interesting thought path to follow, bunny. Perhaps we exist simply for the amusement of poo.
Posted by: nprigoda on February 5, 2003 08:46 PMThanks, tizzie.
I'm usually a "lurk, post, run away!" sort of person. Perhaps I should get one of those shirts?
But Nadia, you were one of the original 9622ers, if I remember correctly? Back in the mother thread?
Posted by: kafka, esq. on February 5, 2003 10:19 PMI recall that nick from the depths of murky prehistory as well!
Posted by: stavrosthewonderchicken on February 5, 2003 11:34 PMYay, Nadia!
(I forgive your coming to Portugal and not looking me up). :)
Posted by: Miguel on February 5, 2003 11:46 PMWow, you guys are amazing!
Dissapearing from this group was the worst mistake of my life!
Miguel: I'm very sorry, but just before we got to Lisbon my mom decided to tell me that she was divorcing my dad. I love my mom, but she's a terrible travelling partner.
Ah, the old "just before we got to Lisbon my mom decided to tell me that she was divorcing my dad" excuse. If I had a dollar for every time I heard that one.
Posted by: witchstone on February 6, 2003 09:16 AMHey, I think you owe me a dollar. So you're back to zero, toots.
Posted by: tizzie on February 6, 2003 09:29 AMAnd TJs out of cigarettes
And my necktie is asleep
And it's so hard
Babysitting these guys
(She's got the)
Babysittin' Blues
(baby baby)
I think we should form a babysitters' club, just like in the books. Then we could swap hints on keeping the monkeys in line.
Posted by: nprigoda on February 6, 2003 12:22 PMMonkeys? In line? Nah. Monkeys are best when swinging thru treetops.
If someone ever said "Me Tarzan, you Jane" to me, and I thought there'd be a cool treehouse with actual monkeys involved, I'd be there.
Posted by: tizzie on February 6, 2003 12:34 PMThere's more than one way to get a baby to sit.
P.S. Is it the song from Adventures in Babysitting?
Posted by: Miguel on February 6, 2003 12:36 PMAnybody care for some baked beans? Got 'em in the oven as we speak. (Always trying something new...)
ps-my girls babysit. One even has CPR and First Aid training (required for paid position at church). So these monkeys, they need changing?
Posted by: b****fire on February 6, 2003 12:44 PMAnybody care for some baked beans? Got 'em in the oven as we speak. (Always trying something new...)
ps-my girls babysit. One even has CPR and First Aid training (required for paid position at church). So these monkeys, they need changing?
Posted by: b****fire on February 6, 2003 12:44 PMP.S. Is it the song from Adventures in Babysitting?
"Give that man a Kewpie Doll!"*
*And that is a line from Stalag 17, which my little brothers quoted every day for about 5 years.
Give that woman a Seppukewpie Doll!
Posted by: kafka-who-fell-from-grace-with-the-sea on February 6, 2003 01:30 PMI'm home caring for a sick child right now. This frees up half my day for drinking, 'cause he doesn't really require a lot of care.
Just thought y'all would like to know.
Posted by: Crash on February 6, 2003 01:32 PMPlease try this at home:
I done learned me somethin new today. *tips hat to kafka*
Posted by: witchstone on February 6, 2003 01:55 PMI knew I was doing something wrong.
*throws away letter opener*
Posted by: tizzie on February 6, 2003 02:19 PM"Give that man a Kewpie Doll!"
Cripes, I just burned a good amount of my employers time trying to figure out what movie has a variation of that line in it.
Journey to Atlantis.
"It takes a lot to get under my skin...
but congratulations you just won the solid-gold kewpie doll."
But "give that man a kewpie doll" is really just a cliché, isn't it? I mean, from the old Coney Island Kewpie dolls on the Midway, right?
Posted by: kafkajayhawkins on February 6, 2003 04:17 PMBut "give that man a kewpie doll" is really just a cliché, isn't it?
I think so, Mr. K. Just a generic term for "you're a winner!"
Posted by: tizzie on February 6, 2003 04:29 PMIf Anne Geddes and the Kewpie doll people got together, it would--
well, I think it would probably unmap the human genome.
Posted by: witchstone on February 6, 2003 04:33 PMi didn't even know what a 'kewpie doll' was, until i played Milton as a monkey.
but that's a story for another day.
Posted by: Marquis on February 6, 2003 05:06 PMor maybe it was jonathan swift.
but i was a chimpanzee for sure.
Posted by: Marquis on February 6, 2003 05:07 PMare we being surreal, or just full of nonsequitirs today?
Posted by: tj on February 6, 2003 05:26 PMI love it when the 500 server error give me the chance to correct my typos
Posted by: tj on February 6, 2003 05:27 PMnosequitirs: (n) random boogers found in the most unlikely places.
Posted by: whatnot on February 6, 2003 05:47 PMI thought it was a form of mosquito there for a minute.
Big game tonight, tj. I'll be watching.
Posted by: adampsyche on February 6, 2003 06:51 PMA true random booger is a special treasure, a cute little doll from heaven. When plucked carefully from their hiding places, random boogers assume the shapes of angels, brightening even the saddest face with the warm green love that is secreted from somewhere deep within us all.
(Offers around the bottle of decongestant)
Posted by: Chico's Geddesburg Address on February 6, 2003 07:00 PM9622.net: random boogers found in the most unlikely places.
Posted by: nprigoda on February 6, 2003 07:03 PMAbove all, avoid the reindeer cheeks.
(For it's always worth clicking on witchstone's links; don't ask me why)
Posted by: Miguel on February 7, 2003 01:37 AM
And the spotlight looks like a prison break
And the telephone's out of cigarettes
And the balcony is on the make
The piano has been drinking
The piano has been drinking
Not me
(great, kaf, now that'll be stuck in the noggin all day.)
Posted by: Vidiot on February 7, 2003 08:38 AMAnd the temperature's weird
And the nose it is dripping
And the ice is as jellyfish soup
On my absolutely disgusting beard.
That is NOT safe for small children or nervous people to look at.
Posted by: b****fire on February 7, 2003 12:45 PMAt the risk of sounding crude--that photo looks like porno.
Posted by: brittney on February 7, 2003 12:58 PMAt the risk of sounding crude--that photo looks like porno.
Hey, you're right! In fact, I think I saw that very picture while browsing www.longjohnsilverbukkake.com.
Posted by: pardon me on February 7, 2003 01:11 PMIt's The Creature from the Icy, Snotty Lagoon!
Posted by: kafkajayhawkins on February 7, 2003 01:24 PMbrittney, that picture of you and your sister has a cuteness factor of 11.5 on a scale of 1-10.
Posted by: tizzie on February 7, 2003 01:29 PMAw, tiz. Thanks.
But I think Lil Sis is mostly responsible. Look at that tongue!
Posted by: brittney on February 7, 2003 01:42 PM9622.net: Look at that tongue!
Posted by: kafka-who-fell-from-grace-with-the-sea on February 7, 2003 01:46 PM*eyes moisten*
I think thay may have been my first ever 9622 tagline.
Posted by: brittney on February 7, 2003 01:47 PMNothing like moistened eyes to cold stop a thread in its tracks.
Posted by: brittney on February 7, 2003 04:25 PMIt was such a tender moment.
The first time...
Ever I tagged
Your line.
Time, today, has had the amazing quality of dripping by like the snot on that guy's beard.
I have been here, at this desk, for one million years. Meanwhile, it is snowy and beautiful outside, and to all the people in that reality, the day has passed in the blink of an eye.
Posted by: tizzie on February 7, 2003 04:32 PMIt was such a tender moment.
The first time...
Ever I tagged
Your line
Yes, this and other hits of 9622, sung by the greatest soul singer of our generation:
NOT AVAILABLE IN STORES. CALL NOW.
Posted by: witchstone on February 7, 2003 04:44 PMWoo!
Tie a yellow ribbon round the--
BLAM!
Thud!
Posted by: kafka-who-fell-from-grace-with-the-sea on February 7, 2003 04:46 PMI'm an EZ rock-n-roll suicide!
Posted by: kafka-who-fell-from-grace-with-the-sea on February 7, 2003 04:48 PMOr perhaps it's that "Screw" editor, Al Goldstein, after his first, bitter taste of bukkake.
[To the tune of "Misty"]
Look at me,
I'm as bukkake
As a snow drop
On a tree...
Etc.
Posted by: Miguel on February 7, 2003 09:39 PMThat Tasmanian devil has got a couple of mates at: http://www.roopooco.com/about.htm
It's from the same site but kangaroos shitting
John
Posted by: John Libby on February 11, 2003 05:25 AMA different perspective is always welcome here, John.
(Welcome aboard!)
Posted by: Miguel on February 11, 2003 12:08 PMWe tackle the tough issues: Indiginenous Australian Feces.
Posted by: the kafka out of space on February 11, 2003 12:26 PMA note about posting images:
We encourage users to post images, especially those hilarous pics of monkeys
wearing dresses or programming for Linux. But posting images that reside on someone
else's server is considered by many to be bandwidth theft. Our thoughts
on the matter, along with some solutions to the problem, can be found
here. Thanks.
In an effort to help eliminate spam (and to preserve the sanity of the 9622 Volunteer Simian Spam-Cop Brigade) all threads older than 30 days will now be closed to comments.