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noooooo ... my precioussssss ...

see, because the guy ate the ring, and ... oh, nevermind.

"Listen you fucker, give me back that peanut or I'll rip your goddamn cheek off!"

Are You A Chimp Or A Champ? Here's a brand new pedagogical quiz from the BBC with not a meerkat reference in sight but a lot about cavemen and other neat stuff. ;)

I don't have a caption, but I have the churning bile of jealousy that the meerkat is not on MY shoulder.

I love meerkats almost as much as I love monkeys. Aw, hell. I definitely love meerkats as much as I love monkeys.

Why can't I be that man?

Kill it! Please, p-p-please, kill it now! I can't m-m-move...

"I'm going to paint a nice little cloud right here...Hank, you go ahead paint a really cute parrot on his shoulder"

OK, OK. I'm not a real meerkat dentist, but I've got some great ideas.

Saddam has a little Ponch thing going on in the picture.

Now really, why do they have to tear that down? Odds are, the next guy will look pretty much the same in a kaffeya, sunglasses and moustache.

Eleanor Rigby

Looks more like Jamie Farr to me.

Of all the new homeland security measures that bother the ACLU, the meerkat-enforced "big smile" policy is probably the most troubling.

Complaints about the mood adjustment-meerkat will only get you an additional meerkat.

"See, he gets this little bit of saliva crusty right here, and it totally wigs me out, dude."

*must...claw...him...to...death...oh no, another camera, I have to look all sweet and cute again, okay good, it's over, where was I? Oh yeah. Must...claw...to...death...."

I am dying of cuteness. Didya see that baby polar bear on Miguel's blog? Oh, that is too freakin' adorable!

I just want to take it home and watch it grow to 800 lbs, and then feed people to it, limb by limb.

When I was in Alaska I'd go hiking occasionally (hey, I'm a city girl) and I was disappointed that I never saw any bears, until I decided that seeing no bears was better than seeing one too close.

I saw a mommy & baby moose, though! And a porcupine! And many Alaskan Alcoholic Males!

And many Alaskan Alcoholic Males!

You can never be too close to those majestic beasts.

I sometimes aspire to being an Alaskan Alcoholic Male. Or at least and Alaskan Something. Seward's Folly holds a special place in my heart, calls to me as an ice-bounded and wooded wasteland invariably will.

Meerkat: "Are we not men?"
Man: "We are Devo."

wow. y kan't kaib tipe? could it be lack of sleep?

Hee hee. Here's a better potential captionee:

Edvard Munch finally gets his corrected photos back from processing. Here, his girlfriend sees the new monster truck he has just purchased. It will still be titled "The Scream."

Teehee - That's brilliant, Mars! :)

Here's the original caption, btw: Sharnel Silvey is shown as she talks about her experiences at the Mustang Ranch as she stands outside the former brothel, March 27, 2003, east of Reno, Nev. Silvey, accompanied by Honey Love, Champagne and Devon, returned to the ranch to tape part of an independent documentary, hoping to preserve part of their past and what remains of what was Nevada's first legal brothel. Silvey is a former manager of Mustang Ranch. (AP Photo/Debra Reid)

So that explains her look of sex-shock...before I read the caption, Mig, kept thinking as I looked closely at the background in the photo, cheap motel, cheap motel what the deal on this pic. The word main by her head was my clue, plus the poor choices in paint schemes.

I can't beat that Munch thing.
You total dick, Crash.

I have to say, my friend Thom, you know a thing or two about the world, don't you? :)

*runs to find a photo for dong, having been done out of one of his wit-flights.

Here you go:

No more Munchies!

Yeah, it takes a toll on the newbies, but inevitably absolutely everyone who works at Guy Laroche agrees the rich scent of Drakkar Noir is easily worth the two hand crushed kittens per bottle.

"Yeah, baby, high five! The Tigers just won their first game! Oh! Sorry about the claws."

"Okay Ted, now the drops should have completely relaxed your ocular muscles, we can begin the lasik procedure now, I just want you to keep your eye trained on this light for-

-RAWRRRRR!-

- Haha! Little ophthalmology humor, Ted. That's my kid's new cat, Eightball. Now, seriously, just keep your eye trained on this light-"

This is obvious proof that catnip is a gateway drug to kitty crack.

"Yeah, that's real great Habib.
Okay, which one of you frat house hosebags sent the exchange student out to 'bring back a little pussy'?"

*laughs himself into projectile vomiting*

Now this caption apparently requires a certain courage. But not if you respect the little guy's attitude, which entirely absolves any witticism.

I can't do it - but you can!

He's a peshmerga, no less.

Here's the original Yahoo caption:

"A peshmerga fighter leaves City Hall as soldiers from the United States Army's 173rd Airborne out of Vicenza, Italy, stand guard after taking control of the building in Kirkuk, northern Iraq (news - web sites) Saturday, April 12, 2003. The 173rd Airborne is taking control of security from local Kurdish groups. (AP Photo/Kevin Frayer)"

Chief among the Peshmerga arsenal is the ability to throw a fart two guys to the right.

Christ no, you did not "bag him", Frank.
A, he's like a foot tall, and B, the real Saddam's first question wouldn't be "Where the leggy chicks at".

*dances around laughing and thanking dong resin*

P.S. The secret to captionese is to really look at the picture - I learnt that today. The second guy on the right IS the key, right?

Peshmerga is a difficult word to resist.

Correct on both counts, your Cultiness.

(Re: Mustang Ranch pic)

I can't believe I ate the WHOLE thing!

Have you procured those lemons yet, Sam? :)

Grocery trip (and laundromat, etc.) planned this evening after work. Looks like a busy week, though.

What were those proportions again?

Till then, guess I'll just have to keep drinking Knob Creek neat. Poor me.

Sam: 2 rye to 1/2 sweet vermouth, drop of Angostura. Dry is good too and 1/4 sweet and 1/4 dry for a Perfect Manhattan. Enjoy!

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