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Choosey monkeys choose Jif!

(although it actually looks like he hateses it.)

A blend of dyslexia and his unwillingness to question would see Dave Jacobs career as flavor control manager for Ben and Jerry's new flavor "Peanut Butter with a Spit of Cappuccino" the shortest in company history.

See, because that's a Capuchin monkey.

Har.

Do you prefer your peanut butter creamy or munky-style?

George Carlin, above, consumes a bucket of paste before every performance. "It backs me up, you know what I mean? And when I'm backed up, I stay pissed off at shit. And staying pissed off at shit is good for business. Now if you'll excuse me, I gotta finish this stuff. Eugh."

It's this dogged, stupid commitment to excellence that has brought him to the top of the performing universe. Or whatever.

"This packs in way better than JPG."

although it actually looks like he hateses it

I dunno, it could go either way. Looks to me like he's trying to thrust his tongue out. I had a friend growing up that had a speech impediment and one of the exercises that he had to do to help overcome it was called "tongue thrusts". I told him that later in life, the ladies would appreciate his strong tongue.

Looks like he is about to toss his peanut butter cookies.

Ew. I just figured out what the chunks were.

[tongue stuck out and vigbrating noise]
It's all mine, scrammmm!..., unless you have jelly.

Sadly, Bongo's love for the JIF cannister was unrequited, and he was left with only sticky fur, a restraining order and memories.

while i'm fresh out of captions, i must say that every single peanut butter except jif sux0rs, no matter what's on sale.

It's mines, mines, mines!!!

The orangutans down the way thought I was mad, but, ha ha, WHO'S GOT THE PEANUT BUTTER NOW, BOYS?!?!?

My ass, she is on fire!

Capuchin, oh.

My ass, she is on fire!

No Johnny Cash for you, Stav.

And it burns, burns, burns.

"It's the latest breakthough in down-country Thai cuisine", the Googlewacking Gourmet said, "where they stuff the monkey full of peanut butter BEFORE they butcher it."
His assistant inquired "Can they do that with cats too?"

I apologize profusely.

"The acquisition of Jif Peanut Butter provides our company with excellent cross-product synergy!" were the last words of the president of Smuckers before his tongue permanently adhered to the roof of his mouth.

Lesson: never use the word "synergy" while eating peanut butter.

Goddammit, dong. You made me laugh so hard I almost choked. (Teach me to eat something while reading caption threads, I guess.)

Plus I'm never gonna be able to see another pint of Ben & Jerry's again without laughing.

That's what I'm not paid for, aine.

I remember once, as a young'un, going camping with the family. The hour of midnight approached, the campfire waned, and we all polished off one last cup of hot chocolate (the drink, not the band) and adjourned to the tin-roofed comfort of our tent trailer. A little while later, this enormous, hail-stormy racket started up, and continued unabated for hours. It sounded like I'd accidentally gone to sleep inside Buddy Rich's snare drum, and the rest of the band walked out on his solo.

We awoke to the sight of a hot chocolate tin with squirrel-sized teethmarks in the lid. Never underestimate the power of a bushy-tailed rodent on a sugar rush.

Or apparently, a monkey with a jar of Jif.

Wendell,just keep the peanut butter away from the bunnies.

Wendell,just keep the peanut butter away from the bunnies.

Curious George was starting to fill the ill effects of the turbulent flight. It was a good thing that the man in the yellow hat liked to collect empty JIF containers and take them whereever he and his simian companion went. Curious George made good use of the empty container as he purged his body of too many vodka tonics and toxic airplane food.

A wave of vomiting consumed the crowded plane. The stewardesses were very busy that flight.

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