9622.net

Everyone loves a smoking monkey.

Aww, I was gonna post this one:

Maybe this will make ColdChef feel better.

Somehow that's worse. But thanks for trying.

I've decided that little whitehaired big-hand monkey looks less like Billy Idol and more like Malcolm McDowell.

Terence Stamp, maybe?

Or William Hickey?

Hey czelticgirl, can you get us all some of these magnets?

Who wouldn't buy one?

Matricide is funny.

Setting: Closet-like office
Background: Big looming deadline at work, total absence of desire to do any work whatsoever

So, anyone doing anything fun this weekend? Anything not fun?

This weekend I'll be playing with my new camera.

I'm about to leave for camping at Fallenleaf Lake, south of Tahoe.

Looks awesome, kaf.

Dana -- I will look around for the magnets, but I doubt we have them here. For starters, no one on this side of the state even knows there is a French Island, WI, much less that a guy had his mom in a freezer there. (They have to make their own fun over there.) But I've got some friends from LaCrosse and I think one of them is going home next weekend. I'll tell him to pick one up if he sees 'em.

As for the weekend, our Aussie Rules football team is playing Saturday, so I'll probably go to that. And there's some kind of airshow, so the Blue Angels are in town. As they'll be flying over my house for two days (and they flew over work all afternoon yesterday), I guess I'll be doing that too. But otherwise, it's a low-key weekend. My liver thanks me for that.

We just got an e-mail telling us that the companies new owners are throwing us an in office beer party at 3:30.

There is a God and he loves me.

I'm waiting for the cable guy on Saturday afternoon.

Wait -- what's so funny? Why are you all staring at me?

Fallenleaf looks lovely. If you go in for that "nature" thing.

I have an embarassment of man-made riches spread before me. If the rain holds out, there's the Water Taxi Beach where apparently you can drink cheap beer with the added benefit of maybe seeing a dead body float by in the river. Then there's the PS1 Warm Up, very much not my scene, but free admission for LIC residents. Then on Sunday, there's the Belmont Stakes, where I guess you're supposed to sit and scream and rip up pieces of paper and throw them all day.

Are you *expecting* the cable guy? Or are you hiding in the bushes and launching an attack on him if he happens to walk by, Vidio?

Let me rephrase: I made an appointment for the cable guy to show up. Having had previous experience with Time Warner Cable, though, I'm not sure I can really say I'm "expecting him", per se.

An ambush may be required.

Tizzie, are you taking your new camera to the yard sale next month

I love how the site says Remember, ALL traffic rules apply. Like the state of TN is lawless or something. Sheesh.

?

(um, that question mark was intended for the end of my previous comment, not as a response to Dana's.)

(I'll be quiet now.)

!

#

Well, may your cable guy look like our pal Karl Hungus and not like, uh, this guy.

Oh, also I might play some golf.

It's good that he's got the plaid thing going on, but where are that monkey's golf cleats?

Jonmc, I'm dreadfully jealous that you are drinking beer right about now. I could use a drink, or ten.

Dana, that warning is justified. After all, there are no speed bumps in the World's Longest Yard Sale.

Look on down the hill and see a specially nice lime green polyester pant suit flapping on the clothes line? You're going to put the pedal to the metal.

I'm having a birthday party for a one-year old, but I'd rather be getting sodomized by, oh, let's say...a yeti. No, wait. An angry yeti.

Speaking as someone who looks at your flickr pictures daily, Chef, I think I'd rather see the birthday party. But that's just me!

It was a nice kegger. and they provided free vitamin water for the squares. I think the new owners are trying to buy our loyalty. This is a good first step.

Yeah, but what kind of beer was it? You don't win employee loyalty with Natty Lite.

You don't win friends with salad!

You don't win friends with salad!

You don't win friends with salad!

Yeah, I may have been singing that in my head as I posted it, crash. May Have.

And for the love of shits and giggles, best worth1k image I've seen yet.

" Monkeys always fascinated artists "

I went to Chicago for a friend's 40th birthday party! I saw friends that I haven't seen in, for some, ten years! I drank beer AND cheapass vodka that had been filtered through a Brita pitcher (not too shabby!). I ate not salad but five big skewers of chicken kabob comprised entirely of chicken! And some doritos! I jury-rigged a TV in a car, on which two little fellows watched tapes! I read half of Freakonomics! I kissed an old girlfriend chastely on the cheek! And her sister! I grilled a fish! I saw a Hawaiian fire dancer! Swut!!

Sent you into a frenzy of exclamation marks, it did! Way to go! Especially the kissing part!

Here in Chicago we're pretty famous for our Hawaiian fire dancers. And our endless bounty of chicken kabobs. And tizzie, there are tons of punctuation outlet stores just north of the city. Most visitors stock up exclamation points and, around Easter, question marks.

In your experience, Slack-a-gogo, can you have too many question marks?

Is that where all those extra punctuation marks come from? We notice a ton of them left behind here in Wisconsin, after the Illinois folks have all come back from Up North. Mystery solved!

There's something poignant about a pile of abandoned colons.

Or, in the case of those who've undergone certain surgeries, semicolons.

Everyone should get a dozen exclamation points when they are born. When they're gone, they're gone.

Curmudgeon!!!!

I save my semicolons and streeeetch them out, until they're all worked up into exclamation points!

Victor Borge springs to mind (see the Phonetic Punctuation clip):

http://www.kor.dk/borge/b-mus-1.htm

I stand behind every exclamation point! If the statement demands one, I employ it - and social mores be damned! Damned, I say!

I don't get out much. Even grilling a fish rates an uptick on the heartbeat-ometer.

Hello.

I am sober.

This is not good.

But it's better than being a dog in outer space.

That'd really suck.

Goodbye a

gain.

Dearest Wonderchicken,
It always brings me great joy to know that you are drinking cocktails while I am having my morning coffee. I, too, will have a cocktail at the end of my day - maybe during your coffee time. The two of us keep the world spinning on its axis, just with the bending of our elbows.
Cheers, friend.

We need a drinker in every timezone if we're to keep the planet from spinning off it's axis, Dr Tiz! I'm serious this time!

Well, Eastern Time is certainly covered.

Central is MORE than adequately covered. We got any in Mountain? That may be a weak spot.

Isn't mr_crash_davis in Mountain Time?

If not, I can always bump up my plans to build a bunker somewhere around there.

Anyone in Newfoundland?

Regardless, this could get messy. Stav, unless I'm forgetting someone in Japan or Oz, you do have the long shift. You'll have to hold the fort from when kaf, witchstone & the left coasters drop out, all the way until Romakimmy wakes up. (That's only a couple of hours, though, as long as Kimmy gets started by lunchtime.) After that, as long as Miguel doesn't mind taking the occasional shift (mind? Migs?), it!

could!

work!

Perhaps a dropcash campaign for some new livers is in order.

If need be, I could shuffle around a few things in my schedule and drink for some other time zones. Anything for the 9622 family. I'll just have to explain to the Mrs that I HAVE to set the alarm for the middle of the night to get up and have a few drinks for a few of the neglected timezones.

"Isn't mr_crash_davis in Mountain Time?"

Oh, yeah, MST here. But I drink during all waking hours, so I can cover anywhere from here to Yakutsk.

Perhaps a dropcash campaign for some new livers is in order.

We could use the same mechanism that we used during Operation Romeo Drop!

::shudders at thought of the sound the hundreds of livers being dropped from above::

Dana's right. We may need some sort of trebuchet for this.

Fes is the only man I know who sounds manly when he says things like "trebuchet."

It's good to see that when stavrosthewonderchicken and I call for a global drinking effort, you benevolent monkeys jump on the train. We're like Live 8, only with booze.

I did my part last night. Stuck it out for a couple of time zones' hours, so in case anyone was slacking, we were covered.

Fes and I will be teaming up to cover Sunday night's shift.

And tizzie, if we're like Live8, can we get Ricky Gervais to do some promos for us like he did for them? Those were brilliant.

Stav, unless I'm forgetting someone in Japan or Oz, you do have the long shift. You'll have to hold the fort from when kaf, witchstone & the left coasters drop out, all the way until Romakimmy wakes up.

With this, I am eminently comfortable. I am both a sprinter and a marathoner.

Not coincidentally, it's t-minus 93 minutes until swill'o'clock here in glorious Gwangyang.

9622: Fuck you, liver!

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